Thursday, March 24, 2011

Feeling Stout - and Breaking Out Of The Funk

I know I've written about this before, but I know a lot of us have them: Fat Days.  I'm having one today.

Yesterday was AWESOME in every way.  My eating was on track, my personal life was on track, I was tackling things on my to-do list left and right, I was motivated and totally ROCKING the #100daychipquest commitment.  In the back of my  mind I thought, "I'm going to have to pay for this kind of positivity."  Silly thought, really.  But still, that's what I thought.

I started today feeling pretty great.  Then I stepped on the stupid scale.  I have GOT to stop weighing myself every day.  After three consecutive days of eating right, moving more, and drinking a shitload of water (120 oz + every day), Dummyhead (my new name for my scale) told me I had GAINED.  Let me just say that I know that mentally (at least for me anyway), it's not healthy to weigh every day.  I know that a person's body goes through lots of changes in a week including water retention, shifting, blah blah blah.  So I stepped on Dummyhead and he said I'd gained and I wanted to throw the entire day (that I had barely started) in the toilet.

Sane?  Not even a little.

The good news:  I fulfilled my goal of drinking 120+oz of water for the day.  I fulfilled my goal of no secret snacking (though I REALLY wanted 13 of the mini turkey burgers I made for dinner last night - I didn't have ANY).  I even fulfilled my goal of staying within my Weight Watchers points for the day (with one point left over).

The bad news:  I still felt fat.  Sitting in my chair at the table, my belly felt abnormally large.  I felt sluggish.  I felt like a failure.  I felt like I felt a year ago.  I felt ugly and useless.  Consequently, I let that attitude slip over to my LIFE.  Nothing I touched seemed to turn out right.  I even remarked to my husband, "I f*ck up everything I touch." 

The even better news:  After feeling sorry for myself I decided that *I* alone had the power to turn my day around.  I made it better.  I spent some extra time with my 2 year old.  She ALWAYS brightens my day when it seems cloudy ("Hey momma, guess what?  How 'bout one of these? - and a kiss on the cheek :) Then when I went to pick up my 6 year old from Kindergarten, I took her hands in my face and told her, "I missed you so much!"  I got to spend the evening with the three people I love the most in this world.  I am happy, getting healther, and I have a husband and 2 girls who think I'm pretty awesome.  An evening with them and I'm back to feeling like ME. 

Take THAT, Dummyhead.  I no longer give a crap what you say throughout the week.  I am going to limit my visits with you to no more than twice per week, as per my "normal" routine.  My love affair with you is OVER. 


  1. Isn't it funny how your scale is automatically male? Mine too! His name is Asshead. Thought that might make you smile.... :)

    I was a compulsive weigher too. Several times daily. Hubby talked me off the ledge. It's once a week now. And that's ok by me! :)

    I hope you feel better tomorrow! Get some good sleep and things will be better. :)


  2. You guys are much nicer to your scale when it pisses you off... mine is not so affectionately known as "F-ck-r" when I am unhappy with my weigh-in ;>

  3. I love it - you guys naming your scales! I so have to do that now! Anyway, I've been weighing myself every day lately, too. Not a good idea - for all the reasons you stated! I'm glad you're feeling better. Have a good weekend....and stay off Dummyhead!!

  4. It's so easy to let the scale be the only measure of success. You listed all the things you had done right and then the scale thing almost blew you out of the water. Hope things are better. "Rejecting 300" at her blog said a friend told her that if you blow out one tire on the freeway you don't get out and shoot out the other three. Glad you didn't do that. Stay well. -Myra

  5. Seems like you've been feeling the same way I have the past couple of days.

    I will share this with you, though. After a kick ass weekend of hardcore working out, I stepped on the scale Tuesday and Wednesday and saw a nasty gain. Shithead (the endearing name of my scale) also almost went out of the window.

    I was informed that I would see the loss from my hard work, but it would take a couple of days for my body to adjust.

    Wednesday, I weighed 214.6lbs. Today, I weigh 211.8lbs!! I haven't worked out since Wednesday, but the hard work from last weekend is slowly starting to pay off.

    Shitface is slowly making his way back on to the nicer side of me.

  6. I am so happy to hear that you had an "up" evening with your loved ones.

    This whole weight loss thing is a b!tch, and she is a helluva lot meaner than her cousin, Karma, let me tell you!

    Hope your weekend is spectacular and tell Dummyhead he's not invited!


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