I know I've written about this before, but I know a lot of us have them: Fat Days. I'm having one today.
Yesterday was AWESOME in every way. My eating was on track, my personal life was on track, I was tackling things on my to-do list left and right, I was motivated and totally ROCKING the #100daychipquest commitment. In the back of my mind I thought, "I'm going to have to pay for this kind of positivity." Silly thought, really. But still, that's what I thought.
I started today feeling pretty great. Then I stepped on the stupid scale. I have GOT to stop weighing myself every day. After three consecutive days of eating right, moving more, and drinking a shitload of water (120 oz + every day), Dummyhead (my new name for my scale) told me I had GAINED. Let me just say that I know that mentally (at least for me anyway), it's not healthy to weigh every day. I know that a person's body goes through lots of changes in a week including water retention, shifting, blah blah blah. So I stepped on Dummyhead and he said I'd gained and I wanted to throw the entire day (that I had barely started) in the toilet.
Sane? Not even a little.
The good news: I fulfilled my goal of drinking 120+oz of water for the day. I fulfilled my goal of no secret snacking (though I REALLY wanted 13 of the mini turkey burgers I made for dinner last night - I didn't have ANY). I even fulfilled my goal of staying within my Weight Watchers points for the day (with one point left over).
The bad news: I still felt fat. Sitting in my chair at the table, my belly felt abnormally large. I felt sluggish. I felt like a failure. I felt like I felt a year ago. I felt ugly and useless. Consequently, I let that attitude slip over to my LIFE. Nothing I touched seemed to turn out right. I even remarked to my husband, "I f*ck up everything I touch."
The even better news: After feeling sorry for myself I decided that *I* alone had the power to turn my day around. I made it better. I spent some extra time with my 2 year old. She ALWAYS brightens my day when it seems cloudy ("Hey momma, guess what? How 'bout one of these? - and a kiss on the cheek :) Then when I went to pick up my 6 year old from Kindergarten, I took her hands in my face and told her, "I missed you so much!" I got to spend the evening with the three people I love the most in this world. I am happy, getting healther, and I have a husband and 2 girls who think I'm pretty awesome. An evening with them and I'm back to feeling like ME.
Take THAT, Dummyhead. I no longer give a crap what you say throughout the week. I am going to limit my visits with you to no more than twice per week, as per my "normal" routine. My love affair with you is OVER.