Saturday, April 30, 2011

Fresh Starts / Feeling in Control vs. Feeling Powerless

I've spent the better part of the past 4 days not making the best choices, not tracking a good portion of my food and generally being in "who gives a crap" mode.  Last week I had a loss of 3.8 - somehow in my mind that equals "relax" instead of "keep it up!"

I sometimes think, in the throes of a binge, that it feels "good" to relax the weight loss journey a bit and just "live a little."  It's amazing how the concept of that phrase changes, isn't it?  Being out of control and not taking responsibility for your actions is not truly living.  I always feel like it's nice to have a day every once in a while where I just don't track anything and eat whatever the hell I want.  Like I've got my old life back.

But you know what?  It's all smoke and mirrors.  Having those days has the exact opposite effect on me.  It fills me with shame and guilt.  It makes me feel weak and powerless.  It makes me feel so...."less than."  That bloated, stuffed feeling serves as a reminder of who I used to be.  I am honestly not that girl anymore.

I have noticed that when I am on a downward slide and I start getting lazy, what usually stops it is when I have a full out binge.  Why is that?  Do I really have to be faced with such a low point to remember what it feels like? 

Today I woke up BRAND NEW.  I was ready to take on the day and make it mine.  I went to the gym and met a friend there, which was really nice.  I bested my time getting to 2 miles on the elliptical (17:03!!!) and then did 3.5 miles on the bike, a good bit of weight training and even half a mile on the treadmill.  Beth told me she could see my weight loss progress.  That felt good!  I gotta tell you - after leaving the gym I felt sore and INVINCIBLE. 

I tracked EVERYTHING I ate.  And we had even planned pizza for dinner.  Guess what I did for the first time ever?  Instead of having 2 pieces and blowing a shit-ton of points, I had one piece and a big salad, and I felt really good about that.

The common thread here is, no matter how good I think it's going to feel to binge and eat whatever feelings I'm feeling - it feels a million times better to be in control and responsible.  Spoken like a true mom, eh?  It's so true for me.  I felt like I was on top of the world today.  I tracked my food intake and had an honest number when I was done with the day.  No fudging the numbers.  That's mostly why I haven't logged anything in the "What I Eat" tab lately.  I couldn't be honest so I didn't put anything at all. 

I don't expect any sort of miracle on the scale on Monday.  But I chose to take the power back today.  I chose to make this day a day full of success and not shame.  I choose to remember why I'm doing this all in the first place - not to be a certain pants size, not to have the scale show me a certain number - but to FEEL good.  To do all the things I've always wanted to do.  I love myself.  I love my life.  It's time to keep showing myself that that's all true. 4 days of poor choices does not determine my fate.  I do.

Friday, April 29, 2011

Clean Eating Cookbook Giveaway!

135by2012 is hosting a giveaway on her blog of the same name!  Go here: and enter!  It's a sweet looking Clean Eating Cookbook that looks awesome!(Plus her blog is great!  Follow her!!)

Thursday, April 28, 2011

I've Been Daydreaming....About The Amish

There's an Amish community close to where I live.  There are miles and miles of farms with roadside stands, a bulk foods store and even several nurseries.

But there is one Amish family who brings their produce into town to sell during the summer.  And I can't wait for them to return to town.  Every year I swear to myself that I am going to buy my produce from them - it's organic and delicious, not to mention affordable.  But what have I done in past years?  Told myself "it's too out of the way" (it's not), "it's a pain in the ass going to another place just for produce" (it wouldn't be), and "what am I going to do with all the kids- mine and daycare kids - while I go produce shopping?" (take them with me and teach them about fruits, vegetables, and farming!). 

So this year, I vow that I will buy farm fresh and I can't wait!!  I plan on buying approximately three gazillion cantaloupes from them.


I just want to take a moment to pimp out my other (new) blog.  It's all about being a mom and the guilt that goes along with it.  It's me doing the best I can as a mom, with the confessions to prove it.  Please take a moment to check it out, and if you like it, consider following it.  Confessions Of A Momma

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Workouts In Relation to Food Choices

I'm a morning workout person.  It's the best time of day for me to get a workout in for a number of reasons. I have two small-ish children, so evenings are mostly devoted to them.  When I have worked out in the evening in the past, I was just too keyed up to wind down and go to sleep.

But most importantly, I've noticed (especially recently) that when I do complete a good workout in the morning, my food choices for the day are much better.  It's as if I don't want to ruin the good start to my day that the workout gave me.  If it were the other way around I'm sure my brain would trick itself and say, "Well you're working out tonight, go ahead and have sixty cookies."

And if I string several good workouts together then when I do take a rest day, I'm more apt to continue the trend of good choices.

If there's one thing that this past week has taught me, it's that psychology plays an even more important roll in my own personal weight loss journey than does food intake or exercise.  That stuff's the easy part.  That stuff's science that can be nailed down.  The psychology part, though - that's just my head trying to play tricks with my head and sometimes that's so difficult to get past. 


I just want to take a moment to pimp out my other (new) blog.  It's all about being a mom and the guilt that goes along with it.  It's me doing the best I can as a mom, with the confessions to prove it.  Please take a moment to check it out, and if you like it, consider following it.  Confessions Of A Momma

Monday, April 25, 2011

The Psychology of A Higher-Than-"Normal" Weekly Loss

This week was great!  I lost 3.8 pounds, which put me in striking distance of the 30 pounds lost mark.  I even  did the fist-pump after I got off the scale (three times, just to make sure).  I felt GREAT.  POWERFUL.  INDESTRUCTABLE.

I went to lunch with my family today after a doctor appointment which involved my lady bits (why does everyone at the gyno look at you like you're knocked up?).  The restaurant visit went wonderfully.  I made good, wise choices, and was proud of my effort in that arena.  I *did* want the fried fish and french fries.  Very much so, in fact.  I could almost taste it!  Instead, I had broiled fish with rice and vegetables and guess what?  It was fantastic!  And I left feeling very in control and with it! I was riding the high!

Why is it, then, that this afternoon / evening, I wanted to eat every. freaking. thing I could get my hands on.  I had a few pieces of chocolate and a few chips and I wanted so much more.  Somewhere, buried in my head was a dusty old thought of, "You did a great job last week, Colleen.  Very well done!  You deserve a reward!"  But that dusty old thought?  Yeah, it didn't mean a reward of a song download on iTunes, or a new pack of cute sticky notes (one of my guilty pleasures).  No, it meant, "SOMETHING DELICIOUS." 

Is it an internal sabotage?  Is it simply my obsession with rewards?  Maybe a bit of both?  I didn't go off the deep end (totally could have) but I'm just really trying to figure these feelings out.  I obviously don't want to self-sabotage.  But I've done this time and again.  I've had lots of big weeks followed by much smaller weeks.  I'm not ashamed of anything I did tonight, but do plan to make better choices tomorrow.

Each day is a gift.  Each lesson is a gift.  Will you choose to be thankful for the gifts you've received?  I will.  I refuse to take them for granted.  Last week?  A 3.8 pound loss.  This week?  The downward momentum continues!

Friend Making Monday - 4/25/11

If you've taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you're new, please take a moment to answer this week's question on your own blog then add a link at the bottom of this post so we can all see your post. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Be sure to head back to Kenz's blog - All The Weigh and check out the rest!

FMM: Today I....
(Actually these answers are technically from Sunday :)

Today I control, and powerful

Today I old friend who came over for a bit of board gaming with my husband and I.

Today I ate...the most insanely delicious hot dog ever (Hebrew National brand)

Today I two sweet girls about 600 times each.

Today I bought...several things at a local grocery store that were on sale AND I had coupons for.

Today I heard...the joy in my 6 year old daughter's voice as she sang along to her new Justin Bieber cd ALL DAY LONG

Today I lost...more ounces :)

Today I decided...that I'll hit a few resale shops tomorrow on my day off with my family.

Today I remember that the candy that's in the pantry isn't even that good.

Today I wish...that my daughters will never be too old to hang out with their mom.  Lilly promises me that no matter what, she'll always want to be near me.  But I know she'll feel differently just a few short years. 

If you participate, please put your link in a comment!  I'd love to see everyone else's answers!

Saturday, April 23, 2011

Easiest Way To Survive A Holiday Meal

Holiday meals (in this case for me, Easter Dinner), are awesome.  So many delicious foods to sample, desserts to gorge on, and this time of year - C A N D Y!!!!

Here's some simple advice on how to survive a holiday meal with your sanity (and nutritional goals) intact:  ENJOY THE EXPERIENCE.  This year, I planned the menu with my mother in law, who is totally supportive of what I'm doing here.  On the menu?  Roasted chicken (yum)!  And I made baked potato wedges, steamed asparagus, lightened up deviled eggs, and brought dinner rolls.  My MIL made this completely and utterly awe-inspiring Dreamsicle Dessert.   I pre-planned what (and the amount) I would have of each thing and there was NO stress. 

I was able allowed myself to enjoy the experience of being with my family and my MIL, of watching the kids on their egg hunt, of having a nice (and not overdone - we usually have two to three times the amount of food we had today) meal with 4 of the most important people in my life.

This is the first holiday meal.... EVER ...... that was not a binge fest.  Where I didn't sneak back into the kitchen for one more bite....two more more bites.  It was heavenly!

Feeling in control is truly a wonderful feeling.

Oh and did I mention that I even had CANDY? 

Happy Easter / Passover, everyone!

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

I'm Not So Good At Making Friends

Online, it's much easier for me to interact with people.  Face-to-face, I'm not so confident when it comes to friend-making.

I don't have that circle of friends that a lot of women have, and I don't have one super close girlfriend I can tell anything to.  People drift, you know?  I wonder sometimes why it is that I'm not very good at making friends.  It's no secret that small talk with strangers scares me.  I'm not much of a joiner, either.  Online friends are MUCH easier to make because I don't have to doubt myself.  I don't have to show myself.  Nobody has to look me in the eye.  Online I am the person I wish I was confident enough to be in real life.

My husband is my best friend, really.  But I don't think he quite understands "girl" issues.  I sometimes wish that I had that super-close girlfriend everyone else seems to have, so I could share girl stuff with her.  But that would involve putting myself out there on a limb, wouldn't it?

I think that part of me thinks that I don't deserve to have a close relationship with any other female because I feel that I'll say the wrong thing, do the wrong thing, or be judged too harshly.  I'm honestly sort of amazed when I meet new people and discover that they like me.  But I rarely take that relationship to the next level, friends-wise.

A pretty smart person (yours truly) once said something to the effect of, "quit whining and just do it."  So this is something I need to be better at....putting myself out there and believing in myself a little more.  I think I'm a good person, and a fairly decent friend.  I just have to trust myself enough to show people that!

PS- this is not a pity party for Colleen....just me making observations.  I'm obviously not miserable - just would like to add that "friends" dimension to my life!

Monday, April 18, 2011

What I Eat

You can now check this out every day (or so) under the "What I Eat" tab.  Instead of cluttering everything up with my What I Eat posts, I thought I'd leave them on the tab and have them all in one spot for easy reference!


Friend Making Monday - 4/18/11

If you've taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you're new, please take a moment to answer this week's question on your own blog then add a link at the bottom of this post so we can all see your post. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Be sure to head back to Kenz's blog - All The Weigh and check out the rest!

FMM: The Grocery Store

1. Do you make a list when you go grocery shopping? Do you stick to it?  I make a list, alright.  The trouble is that I don't always include everything on the list and I ALWAYS have to make a mid-week stop at the supermarket to pick up what I've forgotten

2. Do you buy more groceries when you're hungry?   Always.  I try to go right after breakfast on a Saturday.

3. Coupons. Use 'em?  I go through cycles.  Every 2 years or so I get all hardcore about how I'm going to start using coupons and shopping the sale flyer but it lasts about 2 weeks.  We only have 2 places to get groceries in my town:  WalMart and the supermarket that is way too expensive.

4. Have you ever complained to the manager of your grocery store?  No

5. Do you like to buy groceries at huge chain stores like Wal-Mart and Target? Or do you shop exclusively at food stores?  We used to have a Kroger I liked (they doubled coupons) but when the super WalMart was built, it sort of drove them out of business.  I'd LOVE a Trader Joe's or another option like that closer to where I live!

6. How much time do you spend reading labels in the grocery store?  I buy the same things every week, it seems.  I take along my Weight Watchers points calculator just in case I need to compare something.

7. Do you push your own grocery cart to the car and return it? When I go to WalMart, yes.  When I go to the supermarket, they have people that push your cart to your car and load your groceries for you.  That always makes me feel strange.

8. What is the one food item you always buy at the grocery store that you must have in the kitchen? Yogurt

9. Do you enjoy grocery shopping? Sometimes.  I usually have my kids with me, and that can be fun.  But I will confess that it's BLISS to have that alone time to shop by myself.  I don't have to rush because someone has to go to the bathroom, or explain 86 times why we can't fill the cart with chocolate and cookies.

If you participate, please put your link in a comment!  I'd love to see everyone else's answers!

Sunday, April 17, 2011

What I Ate Today

Well I said I'd give it a go and here it is.  I started keeping a paper food journal today too in addition to tracking on the Weight Watchers website.  I think this is going to be a good thing for me.  So here's what I ate today:

Breakfast - 7 Points
2 eggs (4), 2 slices toast (2) , 1 wedge Laughing Cow french onion cheese (1)

Lunch - 8 Points
Ham Sandwich w/ cheese & lettuce (5), Baked Lays (3)

Snack - 4 Points
2 cups coffee (1)
Apple Cinnamon Multi Grain Muffin (3)

Dinner - 14 Points
2 Turkey Tacos (6 points each)
3/4 cup mixed vegetables (2)

After dinner treat - 3 Points
WW Mixed Berry yogurt (2), 4T FF Cool Whip (1), apple slices (0)

There you have it!  Not sure anyone's really interested, but it might be a way for me to stay on track.  Hope ya'll have a ROCKIN' week!

Planning My Week

Studies have shown that when I pre-plan, I have more success.  And by studies, I just mean going over past weeks.  Really scientific, yeah?  But seriously, pre-planning is key for me.

My family plans all of our dinners a week in advance for the purposes of shopping.  My weekly grocery budget is $100 - that includes toiletries & food for a family of four - PLUS lunches / snacks for my 4 additional daycare children for 5 days of the week, and stuff for my 6 year old's sack lunch she takes to school.  Sometimes I have to get creative.  Lunches for my husband and myself are usually leftovers or a sandwich.

Here are dinners for next week:

  • Pizza
  • Chicken Enchiladas / vegetable
  • Ravioli w/ white & red sauce / vegetable
  • Chicken Sandwiches /  baked chips
  • French Toast
  • Grilled Cheese Sandwiches / Soup
  • Tacos

On nights we're having a dinner with a higher Weight Watchers points value, I go lighter on my lunch & breakfast.  If we're having a low points value dinner, I'll spread the extra points through the day.  We decide what we'll have for dinner in the morning so I can plan the rest of my day.  As far as workouts are concerned, 5 per week is my minimum - usually 3 at the gym and 2 at home.  If I go over that, awesome, but I will not get less than 5.  Water consumption per day will be no less than 120 ounces.

Do you preplan your week?

Friday, April 15, 2011

What can I accomplish in 16 weeks? What can YOU?

There are 16 weeks left until our cruise to the Bahamas.  Some time ago, I blogged about vacation planning and outlined some of my fitness goals for that vacation.

The trip is booked and I've been thinking for some time now about how it is going to be perceived.  Along with a few Twitter friends, the 16 Week challenge was born.  (It's called the SBRChallenge (for Super Bitchin' Rockstar Challenge - if you want to join in just follow me on Twitter @AdiosFatGirl and use the #SBRChallenge hashtag).  There are a few of us in it with varying amounts of weight we'd like to lose by the target date.  Mine happens to be 37 because that would mean that I'll be in under 200 for the first time in a really long time.  And the reason I'd like to reach that goal is (as outlined in my original vacation planning post: 

I want to walk on the beach in a swimsuit and not feel like everyone's saying, "Holy shit, look at that fattie." I want to swim with my children in the ocean free of shame. I want to not hinder their experiences because of my weight.

And dammit, I'm going to reach that goal.

In an effort to do so, I'm thinking about making my food journal public.  I'd hesitated doing this for a host of reasons but I think it'll really help me feel motivated.  We'll see how long I stick with it.  If I feel it's helping, I'll stick with it.  I may not post daily but I WILL post.  I always love reading people's daily food intake (it gives me cooking ideas!) and perhaps the fact that I'll have to FLOG (food log) about it means I most likely won't get naughty! HA! 

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Self Discovery: Why I Binge

I began yesterday feeling so strong and capable.  The more I walked through the day, the more I felt "off."  I felt like I was walking on the edge of a cliff and the ground was crumbling beneath me.  As time wore on, I felt less and less strong and more self-doubt crept into me.  My meals had been planned and usually that is enough.  I was working Day 10 and didn't want to ruin it. But the itch was there.

I found myself in the pantry staring at the food no less than 20 times yesterday afternoon.  And each time I  went about the process of telling myself what a f'ed up thing that was to be doing.  I'm SO close to 30lbs gone.  I just earned my first 10% weight loss - so what the hell was I doing staring at the food and planning my attack for?

When the desire to binge washes over me, this is what it's like.  I have tunnel vision and all I think is: FOOD, FOOD, FOOD, FOOD.  I had baked pineapple cupcakes yesterday.  I wanted to eat ALL of them.  Every. Single.  One.  While baking them I had thought, "Wow, I can really do this.  I can have things like this around and not want to devour all of them."  I was so wrong.  Because they are only 3 PointsPlus each, I thought I could have one....or two.....or three.  Until pretty soon all I could think about was eating those and every other damn thing in my house.  My pulse was racing, my palms were sweaty.

And I felt completely and utterly helpless.





Why do I do this to myself?  I started to binge but stopped myself.  Yes, I know this is huge to have stopped myself.  But the fact still remains that I started (with those stupid fucking cupcakes).  And I talked to my friend Jessie about it.  I tracked everything and only used a handful of my weekly WW points.  The damage wasn't as severe as I'd thought it would be.  I felt better after talking with her, but I still felt - empty.  Earlier in the evening I talked with my friend Beth and my self doubt and self loathing came out (sorry Beth!).  Some days, like yesterday, I feel so lost.  Like I don't have it all together like everyone thinks I do.  Like I have no idea what I'm doing.

And it hit me.


I binge on the days I feel lost, depressed - alone.  I looked back at my calendar to see how often I "restart."  It's on average of every 12 - 15 days.  Sometimes less but never more.  These are the days when my husband asks me, "What's wrong?" And I never have an answer for him because I don't know.  God love him, he wants to help, I just don't know how I can let him.  I'm supposed to be strong.  I'm supposed to know what I'm doing - I'm the mother of 2 children who rely on me - this is how I feel anyway.  And on those days I am dealing with depression, I don't know how to do ANYthing.  Except eat.

The reason I can eat and eat and eat on those days and never feel full is because I'm trying to fill an emotional hole that can't be filled.  I'm trying to heal myself with food.

Look, I don't know why the depression settles in when it does.  I don't even understand what I'm depressed about when it happens.  That's the next step for me - figuring out WHY.  For now, it's such a weight off my shoulders having made this discovery.  Next time I start feeling this way, I can hopefully realize it and take steps to avoid binging to make it go away.

I feel so strong and empowered today.  Many thanks to Beth and Jessie for listening to me last night.

PS for the record - although I started to binge, I'm still counting today as Day 11.  I am allowing myself one week per month to use my weekly WW points, and I guess this is the week for April.  That's ok.  Yesterday, though it didn't seem like it at the time, was a huge success.

Monday, April 11, 2011

Friend Making Monday!

If you've taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you're new, please take a moment to answer this week's question on your own blog then add a link at the bottom of this post so we can all see your post. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Be sure to head back to Kenz's blog - All The Weigh and check out the rest!

FMM: Everyday Things

1) What is your favorite part of an average day?  1:00 - it's early enough in the afternoon to be productive yet realize you have a lot of day left to enjoy.

2) Is there one food that you eat every single day?  I usually eat a protein bar every day for breakfast and it usually satisfies me until lunch.

3) Are you an early bird, or do you prefer to sleep in late?  Before I became a mother, I could sleep in until noon if you let me.  Now that I'm a mom, I prefer to get up early and start being productive.  There's so much to do that I feel really guilty if I waste time sleeping in.

4) Share one thing that you're looking forward to doing this week. My daughter's Kindergarten Musical is tomorrow night.  All of the Kindergarten classes are putting on a performance for family, plus there's an open house.  I love these sorts of things, even though every time I watch her do something like this it makes me cry.

5) What's for dinner this evening? Chicken with Basil Pasta and green beans.  9 Weight Watchers points and so yummy!

If you participate, please put your link in a comment!  I'd love to see everyone else's answers!

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Absenteeism / Wedding Day Jitters

The Fam & I at the wedding
I've been an absent blogger, I know it.  My last update was Thursday, which is unlike me.  But, I guess I just needed a break.  I don't know as I feel refreshed so much as ready to get back at it.  Thursday's post took a lot out of me emotionally and maybe I just wasn't ready to come back until now.

But what I have to tell you about is EPIC.  My father-in-law and his girlfriend of many, many years tied the knot yesterday.  It was a very special day in their lives and my wonderful husband actually performed the ceremony for his father and new step-mother.  As you're all well aware, with weddings traditionally comes lots of food and drink and this wedding was no different.  There was a lot of food and a lot of free beer to be had.  For a few days leading up to the festivities I was actually a bit nervous, but mostly because I didn't know what I was going to wear to the thing.

I did end up buying a new blouse for the wedding and I was SO FREAKING EXCITED that I went down a size in shirts.  That was a nice feeling.

I am happy to report I didn't binge.  And while I did have 3 1/2 alcoholic drinks AND a small piece of cake, I didn't even go over my daily Weight Watchers points.  I was so busy visiting with people and having a good time that food hardly even crossed my mind.  It felt so good to be in control of myself.  I got compliments on my weight loss (and my well-behaved kids!) and the whole event was just a lot of fun.  I wish my father in law and his new wife all the best.  I couldn't have had a nicer day.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

"Mommy, someone at school said I was fat."

I had children later than many women do.  When my oldest daughter was born, I was 29.  My husband and I had been married for nearly six years and before getting pregnant with her, we had tried for a LONG time.  When Lilly came into our lives she filled us with such light and love.  We were so completely amazed that we had a part in creating such a miracle. And then, nearly four years later when Lenna joined (and completed) our family, we were again in awe of how blessed we were.  Our girls mean everything to us. 

I have written before about how paranoid I am about passing my food issues to my daughters.  I just can't bear the thought of either of them going through the humiliation that I did in school, or feeling the social awkwardness that often comes with being overweight.  I'm afraid to have them on the outside looking in at life like I was for many years.

Lilly, who is just in Kindergarten, came to me and said, "Mommy, someone at school said I was fat."  In that one instant, when she was looking to me for guidance, I froze.  I thought - how the hell can this be starting?

You must understand, neither of my girls are even a little overweight.  Both are near the 50th percentile for weight in their age groups, which means they are "average."  Lilly is an extremely active girl (as is Lenna - what two year old isn't?).  There is nothing about Lilly that is fat.

So, I sat with her.  I explained what "overweight/fat" means.  I finally addressed my weight loss journey with her.  I told her how I had gotten this way and what I was doing to address the  problem.  I also explained to her (come to find out, the child who said this to her is a much smaller first grader) that sometimes people just say things to be mean because they are scared or feel insecure about themselves.  Sometimes, though it really stinks, people are just mean.  She is a very perceptive child, and she understands much more than a typical 6 year old child does.  She told me she's proud of me.  God, I love those girls.

Monday, April 4, 2011

What I Ate Today

I don't know if you're even remotely interested in what I ate today but for some reason I felt like sharing. I'm not much of a snacker because when I snack I have a tendency to not stop.  And usually, when I snack, I'm not really hungry, so it's a lot of just eating because my brain says it's time to eat. Sometimes my brain's not so smart.

This weight loss stuff, for me, is all about learning what works for me and weeding out what doesn't.  It's all a learning process.

So that said, here's what I ate:

1 Cinnamon Raisin Bagel Thin w/ margarine (4 Points)

Sandwich made with: 1 slice beef balogna, 1 slice reduced fat cheese, 2 slices Healthy Life bread and LOTS of mustard (5 points)
1 serving Baked Lays sour cream & onion chips (3 Points)

1 serving Hawaiian BBQ Burger (Healthy Life bun, 1 soy burger pattie, 1 slice pineapple, 1T bbq sauce, 1 T light mayonnaise, 1 slice pickle, 1 slice reduced fat cheese) (9 Points)
3/4 cup shells with white cheddar sauce (6 points)
3/4 cup mixed vegetables (2 points)

Evening Treat
1 cup coffee w/ 1 tsp sugar and 3 tsp FF Creamer (1 Point)
1 Special K Chocolatey Chip protein bar (4 Points)

Water intake for the day: 120 oz (not one drop more)

For those of you keeping track at home, that's 34 points used.  I'm allotted 36 for the day.  PLUS I earned 7 activity points today at the gym (which I never touch).  I'm ending the day feeling completely satisfied and very good about my choices today.  I do eat the bulk of my points in the evenings, but I'm a big supper kind of gal.  I can go light on breakfast and lunch but really want to feel like I'm having a meal at dinner time.  This strategy seems to keep me from snacking all evening.

Oh and as a side note for those keeping track at home: I've fallen off the vegetarian wagon.  And I'm ok with that.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Suck It Up And Do It Sunday

Here I am again for another edition of Suck It Up and Do It Sunday.  Thanks to my good friend FattyBoobaLatty at Fatty Made A Funny, I'm participating each Sunday with her to asses the past week's goals and set new goals for the upcoming week.  Go check out her blog!  Now! (Well, after you read and comment on this post, that is).

I just discussed my goals for the month earlier today, so refer to those.  I'll give you a rundown of the past week, though, and what I'm working on this week, briefly.

120oz + of water consumed each day
I did this.  It's actually getting much easier.

Stay within my daily WW PointsPlus range each day (this will not be a week I'll dip into my weekly allotment)
I did this as well.  I really wanted to dip into my weekly points but I didn't.

No Secret Snacking
This is where I failed.  Today of all days - when I was so close to another strong week.  But although I'm technically out of the #100daychipquest race, I am not giving up and am striving for my #7daychip this week.  Tomorrow is day 1

3 Quality Gym workouts / 2 sessions of Yoga at home
Great workouts at the gym on Monday, Wednesday and Friday.  I had a great yoga session on Tuesday morning.  And this morning, my husband invited me to do a set with him.  It was wonderful.  Challenging, but wonderful.

Do something nice for myself each day (and document it to share next week)
I did this most days.  The nice things ranged from giving myself some time to read to just sitting and relaxing.  I'm getting better at this, but it still feels awkward.  Today, however, I bought myself a pair of workout pants for $3 on clearance.  That's what I call success!  Ha!

This week, since today was kind of a wash (it wasn't horrible, it just wasn't up to the standards I'd laid out for myself), I'm making some back to basics goals for this week:

  1. 120 oz of water each day
  2. 3 Gym Workouts / 2 Yoga Sessions
  4. Find something I love about myself EACH day

They may sound kind of simple, but back to basics is always successful for me.

I wish all of you a wonderful week!

And there ya have it.  Make me stick to my goals!  If you'd like to participate, just steal the graphic above and make sure to put a link to FattyBoobaLatty's blog - Fatty Made A Funny to give her credit for the idea!!  What are your goals for the week?

End of March Wrap Up Party! / Goals for April

At the beginning of March I set some goals for myself and my weight loss journey. I'm going to examine them today and establish some goals for April.

 March Goals

I am starting the month weighing in at 244.4.  I would like to end it at at least 235.

I think that with my weigh-in tomorrow, I'll be really close, within a couple of pounds.  But I haven't quite made it.  Is this a win or a loss?  I saw it's a toss up, really. On one hand, I didn't make the actual goal, so - loss.  On the other hand, I have been losing well (despite having a 2 pound gain one week), so that's a win.

I will try two new healthy recipes this month.
I did try some EXCELLENT stuffed mushrooms this month that were awesome.  We love to have "snack night" meals and these are a perfect addition.  They're delicious and very calorie friendly, so I can have one or two of the more decadent things and several of the stuffed mushrooms and still feel satisfied and like I participated in "Snack Night."

The other thing I tried (though it's not my recipe) was a Tall Cinnamon Dolce Light Frappuccino at Starbucks.  It's a little slice of heaven and only 3 WW PointsPlus (120 calories).  It. Is. Exquisite.

I will get to the gym 3 days per week.  If I have to skip a day due to an unforeseen circumstance, I will make up the "appointment" and go another day.
I am proud to say I have done this every day and have added in 2 days of yoga at home.

While I am at the gym I will utilize every minute to my advantage.
I can 100% say that I have done this.

I will take time, each day, to set a healthy example for my daughters.  It could me something as simple as reminding them I love them the way they are to having them help me prepare a healthy meal for our family.
This is becoming second nature and it's a really nice thing.

I will drink at least 64 ounces of water per day
I have done this!  Not only that but since starting the #100daychipquest, I have drank 120 oz of water each day for the past 12 days.

Goals For April

  1. Goal weight for the end of April: 229
  2. Drink 120 oz of water daily
  3. 5 workouts per week, no excuses
  4. Blog 6 times per week
  5. Try 2 more healthy recipes this month (I love cooking new things!)
  6. Log 50 miles at the gym this month with a combination of elliptical, treadmill, and bike

What are your goals for April?

Friday, April 1, 2011

I'm a Guest Poster (for @leavingfatville !)

I wrote a neat little post about momentum in weight loss, and it's up and looking all shiny at the Leaving Fatville blog!

Leaving Fatville has lost 60 pounds so far.  Did you hear that? SIXTY!  That's a lot of pounds and she's still going strong.  She'd really like to attend the FitBloggin 2011 conference in Baltimore being held in May.  If anyone deserves to go, it's this chick.  She's so super-awesome that not only does she blog me the heck away any day, she also runs The Great Clothing Exchange - which is a place to get rid of your clothes that don't fit anymore and pick up some that do!  So please check out her blog and consider donating a little something so she'll be able to go!

Thank you, thank you, Leaving Fatville, for having me as a guest on your awesome blog today!!

Head to now!!
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