Push Past The Pain

Before this year hit I was somewhat of a half-assed worker-outer (yes, that's a word I totally just made up.)  I would go to the gym, half-ass some time on the treadmill, take a shower and go home, claiming I'd "worked out."  Mostly, I was just watching the news while walking at a leisurely pace.

Now, however - and this is just as shocking to you as it is to me - I like to sweat when I go to the gym.  It's the mark of a good workout.  My love affair with the elliptical is still going strong and I've been treating it like a game.  Each day I push myself to go a farther distance in my allotted time.  More resistance.  Longer times.  And you know what?  It's FUN.  I'd wondered in the past when I'd become that person who loved to work out, and while I don't know that "love" is the word I'd use for it, we're getting much closer to that than ever before.

Fast forward to the end of last week when I started doing Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred DVD with Joanna from Diary of A Mad Fat Woman.  Day 1, I was doing good.  It was a Thursday which traditionally I don't go to the gym on those days.  I actually finished the level 1 workout which is something I hadn't ever done before.  I've had the DVD for many months, and even "tried" it once.  And by "tried" I mean I got dressed in my workout clothes, tried a few moves and watched Jillian do the rest.

Day 2 brought with it a workout at the gym, followed by about eleventy billion (another made up word - you're welcome!)  hours of gardening....pulling up new mulch, digging, dragging heavy bags of mulch and planting and placing full containers where they needed to go.  By the afternoon I was sore.  By the evening I could barely walk, so I skipped my date with Jillian.

Day 3 brought a busy day with family, much recovery from the day before and although I didn't want to even one single bit, I completed the Level 1 workout again.  I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO SORE IN MY LIFE.  In addition, in the morning I completed a killer 30 minute elliptical workout.  When I started it, I swear to you, I felt like I couldn't even go 3 minutes, much less 30.  But I worked through the pain and the truth is, after both workouts I felt incredible  INVINCIBLE. 

Day 4?  A lot of stress and a little overeating but still - I completed my date with Jillian.  And on this day more than any other I felt a sense of accomplishment for sticking with it.  Yes, I was sore as hell, but am coming to relish that. 

Yesterday was Day 5 and honestly, I just wanted to crawl in bed and call it a day, but I dragged my ass in front of the tv and did my workout anyway. 

I love the feeling of pushing past the pain and achieving things I never though I was capable of.  I love not giving up.  I love the sense of pride I feel in a job well done.  Pushing past the pain reminds me that ALL OF THIS - this whole flipping journey - is indeed possible.  I know in my heart I can do what it takes to FINALLY make myself a success story instead of a "could have been."