I had a good thing going some months back. Then I decided it was all too much, that my mind was far too fragile to deal with weight loss. This, of course, gave me the golden ticket all of us food addicts crave to eat whatever we want. If it sounds good, eat it!
The truth is, I'm a food addict and I will always have this struggle in my life. What I have to do is find out why I'm so broken and how to glue the pieces back together. In the past several months I have found a church I really love and I have been seeking spiritual help.
Another truth? I can't do all this alone. I am weak, but I want to be strong. I really do. I know in my heart I have to dig deep and find my strong. But what happens when you start to dig and the hole you find seems so deep that you can't see the bottom?
I've come to a point in my weight struggles where the physical toll this is taking on me is huge (no pun intended) and my energy comes from caffeine.
I want to love myself as others do - I want to see myself as others do, but in reality I don't. I think part of what I need to do is forget the past. Yes, I had a fantastic go of weight loss a while back, it's true! But a while back is not not and a while back isn't going to make me succeed now. What I did before doesn't matter, you see? Because before and now are two totally different things and now is the only thing I can control.
What was your first small step to battling your weight?